Don’t buy the $19 Apple polishing cloth

Apple’s most back-ordered new product isn’t the new MacBook Pro. And no, it’s not the iPhone 13 or the company’s latest Apple Watch. AirPods? Nope, not that either. Are you ready for this shit? It’s a $19 piece of cloth.

Yes, Apple’s most back-ordered new product is a $19 polishing cloth with an expected ship date of January 11. I’m just going to leave that to sit there for a bit.

I’m not going to get into the specifics of the product details about this wiping cloth or how it’s made because, at the end of the day, it’s A WIPING CLOTH. The only thing we should be talking about is how Apple is criminally charging its customers $19. 

But if I must, here’s how The New York Times describes it: 

“The cloth, imprinted with the Apple logo in the corner, is made with “soft, nonabrasive material” to clean the screens of iPhones, iPads and MacBooks “safely and effectively,” according to the product page. The listing adds that the Polishing Cloth — capital P, capital C — is “compatible” with 88 different Apple products.”

Good grief.

Speaking of the New York Times, they spoke to a guy who was able to snag not one, but four (yes, four $19 wiping cloths) Apple polishing cloths. He even posted a tweet about it, proudly showing off his stupid purchase. 

“It’s just a point of sheer excess,” Mr. Lee acknowledged, calling the splurge an impulse buy of “the most elite cloth.” He added: “I just spent $4,000 on a laptop. What’s another $19?”

The funniest part about this quote is that NYT actually sent out a photographer to get a picture of the guy who spent $76 on Apple-branded polishing cloths. I hope they don’t mind if I use the picture: 

Look at him, my man, he’s so proud. He totally looks like a guy who would spend $74 on wiping materials. All the power to him.

Listen, I’m not going to judge how you spend your money (OK, maybe just a little), but there are other options out there. You don’t have to buy Apple’s version of a polishing cloth. 

If you don’t feel like waiting or spending $19 on Apple’s option, here are all the different kinds of wiping cloths you can buy on Amazon right now and can get it shipped to you as soon as tomorrow.

If, for some reason, you can’t see all the options I embedded above (probably because you’re using an ad-blocker, boo), clicking this, this, and this will also drive my point home. But whatever you do, don’t throw your hard-earned money at Apple’s $19 wiping cloth.

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